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Taking Back the Reins

Mirriam-Webster defines a rein as "an influence that slows, limits or holds back." The term is normally thought of in equestrian terms with horses being controlled by a line or strap, called a rein. However, when you put it in terms of our human lives, you can see that we all have reins as well. So, who's pulling your reins and is it time to take them back? From the moment we are born we are faced with these controlling forces. The newborn baby is swaddled so tightly in a blanket that it cannot move around. This is for the baby's own protection, for warmth and security. This "swaddling" continues as the child grows in many forms, all controlling and "for protection."

At some point in life, we feel the pull to take our own reins and so the beginning of finding our own identity, our own strength takes shape. For some, though, giving someone or something else the power to pull the reins happens before we even recognize what transpired. We start feeling that "swaddling" and it does not feel so comfortable any more. This is when we have to take a long, hard look at our situation and begin to analyze whether we are on the right path. There are, after all, many walking paths -- some with thorns and brushes, some with steep cliffs, and some with deep water. The key is to find the one with a balance and where you can find clarity of vision. You don't want to blindly go off a cliff because something was blocking your view.

So, how do we take back our reins? The first step is acknowledging that we are not the ones making our own decisions, if this is the case. Are you doing something because it is what is expected of you or maybe you just do not want to make waves -- or are you doing it because it feels right inside? Once you figure out if you are in control or someone or something else seems to be, then you have to decide if that is how you want to live your life or not. If so, then continue on. If not, then you have some work to do! You will know when it is the right time for you. Someone told me tonight "I can't go on being unhappy." That is the first step. When you know your situation is not what you desire or are willing to permit to continue. Then you have to start looking at options and the different walking paths, what obstacles are in the way, which ones you can move and which ones you have to go around. The most important thing once you decide to make a change is to start taking baby steps toward the ultimate goal -- taking back your reins. Hugz~Love

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